Through the Fog and the Darkness
Indus Tennessee (band), Cookeville, March, 2019
I was scrolling through old photos on my phone, and I came across the cover image for this post. The image is of my friend Michelle performing with her band; it’s probably one of my favorite photos that I've ever taken.
Before I tell you the story of how I got the shot, you need to know four things:
At that time in my life, things were going terribly.
This story takes place on the weekend before Match Week, 2019.
Match Week is the week when all the graduating med students find out where they’re going for residency (or if they even have a place to go).
I’d graduated from medical school a few years before and had already failed in the match a few times, so I didn’t have any hope that the odds would be in my favor.
STORY TIME:
A few months before this, I met Michelle and Kyla at a Blues dance event in Atlanta, and she had invited me to visit. Blues dancers are a friendly bunch, but who invites a total stranger to visit their hometown? Apparently, Michelle does, and she was serious about it. So we picked a random weekend in March, and pretty much forgot about it.
About two weeks before the trip, it finally dawned on me that this trip was happening right before Match Week. On the first day of Match Week, everybody finds out if they matched into residency, and on the last day, everybody finds out where they're going. If that first day doesn't go well, you pretty much spend the rest of your week in front of a computer or your phone trying to find any available slot.
I’d started to have second thoughts because of Match Week and several other factors, but I ultimately decided to go. I figured that I’d be better off having a great weekend with friends instead of waiting around for the inevitable. So I packed my bags and off I went.
The trip up the mountain was terrible. I knew that it was going to rain, but I was not prepared for how heavy the storm would be as I drove up the mountain that night. When it wasn't raining, the fog was so heavy that I couldn't see more than a few feet in any direction. Cell reception and GPS were also spotty. I was terrified that I was either gonna fly off the edge of the mountain or crash into an obstacle that I couldn’t see.
After the most terrifying drive of my life, I finally made it into town. The three of us met up at a local bar, where the band was performing. I’d brought my camera with me and I was taking some pictures of their performance. I remember struggling a lot that night because the air was still pretty cold, and it was fogging up my lens. I was frustrated with most of the shots from that night, but when I saw this one on my computer the next morning, I knew that it had all been worth it. The fog had created this dream-like effect that really brought the image together.
The rest of the weekend went pretty well, but it was nothing like that first night. I got into Georgia late Sunday night. When I woke up on Monday, I learned that I had finally matched into a residency program.
Every time I see this image, I remember the challenges I faced that night to get the shot. More importantly, I remember all the things that were tied to that moment, that the photograph doesn’t show.
A good photograph will freeze a moment, but a great photograph will anchor your life.
Looking back all these years later, I think of this picture as a metaphor for life. After the storm, you might still struggle through the fog and the darkness, but eventually, you're gonna make it to the other side, and it will all be worth it.
